A(n)nals of Online Dating

+4 for forward. Does he think there’s a woman out there who is like, “Yes, I definitely want a man who solicits ass-eating on the internet to come and put his mouth on MY ass. Surely no problems there.”?

+10 for her responses. I love this girl. Although note to girl who I love: I think the proper terminology among the kids these days is “dick pic.”

+4 for him not getting the joke and clarifying — “No, when I said I wanted to eat your ass, I meant I wanted to lick you from your crack to your clit.”

+5 for thinking that her pussy is part of her ass. It reminds me of when I was in health class in 7th grade and we were watching The Miracle Of Life (which for those of you who didn’t take health class in a liberal city in the 90s was a close-up video of a woman’s vagina as she gives birth), and as the baby in the video crowned, a young man in my class screamed out, “OH MY GOD! IT’S COMING OUT HER BUTT!” Then another kid passed out. Seems like this guy didn’t have the top-notch health teachers I did.

TOTAL POINTS: 23