A(n)nals of Online Dating

some of my pet peeves are the sound of dishes clanking together, the sound of empty beer bottles hitting each other, the sound that silverware makes whn it hits a hard surface, the sound of static, and a really high pitch beeping sound hurts my ears, and i say all this cuz to some ppl it may not hurt there ears but i have real sensitive ears… so i now will tell u wat i have for pets i have a boxer/pit mixed dog named Rockey and i have a black and white baby rat named Kira, i know this next part is goin to sound kinda out there but i’m basicaly a werewolf kinda i mean i don’t turn into one i just get the personality of one like i love the moon, i like to howl at the moon, i like to bite, and my k-9 teeth get sharper whn the moon comes out like i said it sounds pretty out there but its true, i mean i like werewolf’s more then vampires…. if u want to talk more to me other thn on here add me on my [email] account which is mc_magicfart_[redacted]@[redacted].com yes i know it sounds kinda funny or childish but i made it i think in 2001…

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+5 for how to you live at all if every single noise drives you insane?

+2 for thinking that things everyone hates, like really high-pitched beeping sounds, are “pet peeves.”

+3 for grammar, spelling and punctuation carnage.

+12 for “I’m a werewolf.” You definitely also have a really awesome Tumblr, right? And you’re a totally oppressed Otherkin?

+5 because what woman doesn’t want to date a dude who howls at the moon and bites? TEAM JACOB!

+4 because a REAL wolf would have eaten the rat and the dog by now.

TOTAL POINTS: 31.