Month: December 2012

Only if you fuck as well as you punctuate.

+5 for no punctuation at all. +15 because who among us has not wanted to get up on a gurl’s buttcheeks? +6 for the slow-roll “gurrrrrlllll” at the end. Perfect delivery. Mad sexy. TOTAL POINTS: 26.

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Jelly seems like a better option.

I’m not saying I’m chivalrous, but I’m polite. Before anal sex I’ll be sure to put some nutella or peanut butter on your butthole and lick it up. +8 because lining your butthole with a nut-based spread is extremely polite in some cultures. Right? +5 because this guy has definitely never had anal sex before […]

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Do werewolves fart, though?

some of my pet peeves are the sound of dishes clanking together, the sound of empty beer bottles hitting each other, the sound that silverware makes whn it hits a hard surface, the sound of static, and a really high pitch beeping sound hurts my ears, and i say all this cuz to some ppl […]

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“Horror all the way” is the most accurate thing you said here.

My self-summary: I’m relaxed, cool, and sometimes off the charts crazy. Unpredictable and mysterious. I’m the type of woman to slap you across the face and then pull your pants down and devour you. I’d be happy to find my perfect match. You must be WHITE. I accept nothing else or less. Sending me a […]

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