A(n)nals OF Online Dating

hi am mulangila a prince and i would like to have an intimate relationship with you +3 for what a pick-up line. +5 for “I’m a prince.” I think this is probably not true? +2 because don’t they teach you to capitalize in prince-school? +6 for “I would like to have an intimate relationship with […]

I love that site. I will start off by admitting I’m not Brad Pitt but I’m not the worst looking guy in the world either. I have a great job, I’m athletic, I’m smart and I’m funny as shit. I know everyone thinks that they’re funny but I’m the funny guy. All of my friends […]

Subject: Too much to handle??? Well aren’t you gorgeous for being so young and so very tiny…thought you were underage at first. It’s not often I can say that about such a fragile and innocent girl being very attractive. You probably can’t keep up with an experienced, adventurous and naughty bad man unfortunately, can you? […]

Dear (omitted), Yes please call me @ (omitted), I like the song I JUST HAVEN’T MET YOU YET!!! Try not to call during AMERICAN IDOL. Thank You, Looking forward to hearing from you, Sincerely, Omitted +3 for three different sign-offs. +2 for using ALL CAPS to denote titles. +5 for scheduling his dating life around […]

Subject: Erotic Massages oh hi….can you feel me lightly kissing your toes as I am massging the bottom of your feet. now I am kissing the bottom of your feet as I rub the top of them. slowly I move my hands up to your ankles and gently rub them. now I begin to rub […]

subject: None can be saved; only deceived. My greatest friends have been gay, and my greatest enemies. The rest of the world never seemed to care. I have a rather painful problem. I am a man, and I can only fall in love with women who are gay. I always get bored with straight girls. […]

Ok well I’m not going to lie, I don’t waste peoples time. I’ve been here a while and met a few people, and I’m disappointed to say the least. I can honestly say the selection on here is mostly scary to me. I have no problem with single moms or girls that are other than […]

hi,have u ever participave in miss of the usa contest? +10 for “miss of the usa.” +2 for spelling and grammar carnage. +5 for the compliment. What a sweetheart. TOTAL POINTS: 17.

SUP BABY I DIDNT READ YOUR PROFILE CUZ I DONT LIKE READING. U WANNA GET SOME FRANZIA N TALK? +100. You win. TOTAL POINTS: 100.

filter me into your chat, send me your #, and put up a full body photo +6 for this self-described “super hot male” not putting up any photos. +3 for messaging her a list of a demands. +4 for “full body photo.” Gross. TOTAL POINTS: 13.