How do you say “No fucking way” in Italiano?

tu se belissima bella, molto molto molto belissima bella, you are absolutely beautiful and astonishing, that was italian, and no I am not italian, I just lived in italy for three years, and asia for three plus years, and I would be very interested in getting to know you, how about affording me an opportunity to do that bella, 

I am somewhat new to south florida, although I have been a resident for some time, I just never really lived here and that would be because of my extensive career in the military, and now that I made my transition back into the civilian population, I am enjoying myself, 

I look forward to your reply, 

cam,

Eight days later, same picture, different username:

ciao bella, I would be very interested in getting to know you, care to give me a chance bella ?

+3 for the double message. If you’re going to try to be sneaky, at least execute it.

+5 for “That was Italian.” Actually no, not really.

+4 for using his very simple, very incorrect Italian as a way to tell her he lived in Italy for three years, and in all that time was unable to learn how to say “you are pretty.”

+3 for thinking that dropping some Italian will drop the panties.

+2 for punctuation carnage. Commas and periods serve different purposes, my friend.

TOTAL POINTS: 17.